An Empty Mind-I

 

" An Empty Mind - I "

March 12

" Ham log kahi na kahi to aaisa soch rahe hote hain ki kyun na ham sabh kuch chhod ke kahi dur chale jayee! kisi dusre shahar me jaa ke ek nayi zindgi ki shuruaat kare? ye karna to chahte hain lekin kabhi kar nahi patee. "

Kabhi karna hota hain to ghar ke halat nazar aate hain , Kabhi karna hota hain to maa-baba ka chehra nazar aata hain, Kabhi karna hota hain to yad aata hain wo lamha ki agar inlogo se dur chale gaye khud ke liye to inlogon ka kya hoga?

Aaj me kuch aaise hi ek kahani share kar raha hoon jahan family ki ashali value samaj me aayegi.

Sab ki tarah mujhe bhi lagta tha ki mera pariwaar kabhi kabhi meri zarurate puri nahi karta. sab ki tarah mujhe bhi lagta tha ki kyun ye har waqt mujhe kuch karne ke liye rok dete the. kyun har waqt ye har baat ke liye mana karte the. kyun har waqt kahi jane ke liye permission mang ne par bhi nahi milti thi.

gussa aata haina?.... kabhi kabhi..

Ab samaj aa raha hain ki baba ki dhaat me bhi pyaar tha, mummy ki na me bhi kahi na kahi hamari fikr thi.

Aaj us baat ko beete kareeb 2 saal se bhi zyda ho gaya hain.. lekin aaj bhi yaad aate hain wo din.

yaad karne pe rona bhi aata hain aur guilt bhi hota hain ki kyun me hamesha bas khud ki manmani karta tha..

(Vivaan Siting on a bench at his terrace and thinking)

2 saal ho gaye, badal sab gaya hain, kitna bhi try karoon bhulne ka lekin bhul hi nahi pata agar ma-baba ne mujhe sab bataya hi nahi hota to me kabhi bhi sacchai jan nahi pata.

agar ma-baba nahi hote toh me kab ka is duniya ko alwida keh diya hota.

2 years before..

puri duniya ek jung lad rahi thi , log dare huye the, ghar se bahar chah kar bhi jaa nahi sakte the,sab kuch ruksa gaya tha.

waha dusri aur ek jung yahan bhi ladi ja rahi thi. baat lockdown ke dino ki hain shahar ki hawa kuch zyda hi kharab hone ke karan vivan uski family ke sath uske gauv ke ghar me rahne ko chale gaye jab tak sab kuch theek nahi ho jata.

gayee the sab theek karne ke liye lekin unhe koi andaza bhi nahi thaa ki wahan kya hone wala tha.

vivan uske gauv me uski bhua, uske bade papa aur badi mummy ke sath rehta tha.

bhua khus si ho gyi thi hame dekh ke ki kitne arso baad pura parivaar aaya hain,ham bhi khus the ki itne arso bad ham bhi purane bachpan ke din jiyenge. Phirse wahi hamare purane ghar me rahenge, khelenge aur bhua ke hath ka khana firse naseeb hoga.

2 din sab sahi chal raha tha uske bad yuh hua ki sab badal gaya.

shahar se badi bhua achanak gauv aaye the unki tabiyat zyda hi kharab ho chukii thi. ghar ki chhat pe eagle ki awaaz aane lagi thi mano kuch to bura hone wala ho. andar hi andar kuch bura hone ka ahsas ho raha tha.

badi bua meri ek dum best friend thi.hamare bich ek connection sa tha maine meri zindgi ka sabse accha waqt unke sath beetaya tha.Hasna, khelna, kabbadi khelna ek dusre se apne sare secrets share karna aaj bhi yaad aata hain.

Hamesha hasne wali bua aaj ek jung si lad rahi thi jab wo aaye us raat hamne unki tabiyat kharab hone ke bauzud bhi bahut baate ki thi.

Dusre din bua ki tabiyat me thoda sudhar sa tha sab ko laga ki bua dhire dhire theek ho rahe the.

Phir ek din achanak raat ke kareeb 2:30 baje the me so raha thaa apne room me achanak se ankh khuli toh dekha sab log daud rahe hain.

 

Mummy ke chilaane ki aawaz, papa daud rahe hain sab log bua k aaspas khade nazar aaye, bua sans nahi le pa rahe the sare log unke hath pairo ko ghis rahe the.

Zyda tabiyat kharab hone ke karan phir unhe hospital le jane ka socha. sab log unke sath hospital gaye ghar me sirf me , bade papa , badi mummy aur mera bhai the.

Mummy dia jalane gayi ham log phir bagwan ji ke pass pray karke sone gaye.

me sone gaya toh mujhe unke sath beetaye har pal yaad aane lage aur ek dar sa lag raha tha ki wo hame chhod ke chale na jayee. me ye sochte sochte so gaya.

2 ghante ho chuke the koi phone call nahi aaya aur achanak se phir phone ki ring bajji ..

aur tab papa ne bataya ki bua hamare bich nahi rahi..ye sunke sab tut gayee. sab log ro rahe hain , bacha me bas kone me khade ni-sbhd khada hoon.

Dusre din unke antim-kriya karke ghar wapas laut gaye. ghar aane bad jab me baitha achanak se teen - se chaar baar ek hi baat ko dauhraya jaa raha main bas ek hi baat bol sa raha tha ki " Bua challi gayi..?" aur phir rone laga, bahut zyda rone k bad mummy ne unki gaud me shir rakh ke mujhe sulaya.

Meri ankh raat ke 3 baje khulli me apne bed pe baitha tha.Mujhe baitha hua dekh ke papa achanak se mere pass aa ke mujhe aawaz laga rahe hain. "Vivaan! bete kya hua? neend nahi aa rahi ? Vivaan!!" papa ki aawaz mere kano tak pahuch to rahi thi lekin me kuch bol nahi pa raha tha.

Jab meri taraf se kuch response nahi mila papa uth ke mere pass aake baithe.. mera hath pakad ke mujhe puch rahe hain aur ek taraf me baitha hua hoon ! naa kuch bol raha hoon, na kuch sun raha hoon , ankhe khuli hui hain lekin palake zappak bhi nahi rahi hain.

tab achanak se aawaz lagayi ye kaun hain? 

To be continued…